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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27511927">On My Own</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/danrdarrenc/pseuds/danrdarrenc'>danrdarrenc</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Transferred from Fanfiction.net [47]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2010-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2010-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-08 04:09:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>538</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27511927</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/danrdarrenc/pseuds/danrdarrenc</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Willow's feelings about Xander. Oneshot, songfic based on the song "On My Own" from the show "Les Miserables", set in Season Two after the Xander/Cordy news comes out.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Xander Harris/Willow Rosenberg</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Transferred from Fanfiction.net [47]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1959493</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>On My Own</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Willow Rosenberg watched from the window of the school bus as her best friend, Xander Harris, said a very long and non-verbal goodbye to his girlfriend Cordelia Chase. Willow did not want to watch – it caused her too much heartache – but she could not look away; she was too in love with Xander to stop watching him, no matter the hurt. Willow knew that her feelings were unrequited, but, still, she held a hope in her chest that Xander loved her back and was just too afraid to say so. Finally, Xander and Cordelia broke apart and Xander proceeded to board the school bus. He walked directly towards the seat where Willow was sitting and sat down.</p><p>"Hey," Willow said.</p><p>"Hey, Will. What's going on?"</p><p>"Nothing. How about with you?" Willow asked, though she already knew what the answer would be.</p><p>"Well, I'll tell you. Cordelia sure can kiss," Xander smirked. Willow smiled painfully and looked out of the window.</p><p>At that moment the doors closed, the bus lurched, and they began to move.</p><p>"I'll bet Oz is a good kisser," Xander said, poking Willow jestfully.</p><p>"What?" Willow said, startled out of his reverie.</p><p>"I said I'll bet Oz is a good kisser," Xander said, smiling.</p><p>"Yeah," Willow conceded and looked out of the window again. She was happy to be sitting next to Xander but the conversation was getting painful and Willow needed to get off of the bus as soon as possible.</p><p>After what seemed like an hour – though it was only twenty minutes – of pointless and hurtful chatter with Xander, the bus came to a stop outside of the Rosenberg house and Willow quickly stood up. She grabbed her backpack, said a rushed goodbye to Xander, departed the bus, and entered the house.</p><p>Nobody was home, so Willow went directly to her bedroom. She threw her book bag onto her bed and sat down at her desk. She opened her laptop and entered the password that was needed to log on. She began to type, words flowing from her fingers like water from a fountain:</p><p>
  <strong>On my own</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Pretending he's beside me</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>All alone, I walk with him 'til morning</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Without him I feel his arms around me</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>And when I lose my way I close my eyes</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>And he has found me</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>In the rain the pavement shines like silver</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>All the lights are misty in the river</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>In the darkness the trees are full of starlight</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>And all I see is him and me</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Forever and forever</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>And I know it's only in my mind</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>That I'm talking to myself and not to him</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>And although I know that he is blind</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Still I say there's a way for us</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I love him</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>But when the night is over</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>He is gone; the river's just a river</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Without him the world around me changes</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>The trees are bare</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>And everywhere the streets are full of strangers</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I love him</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>But everyday I'm learning</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>All my life I've only been pretending</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>Without me his world will go on turning</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>A world that's full of happiness that I have never known</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I love him</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I love him</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>I love him</strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>But only on my own</strong>
</p><p> </p>
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